“Telling it all” in anonymity makes me brave with what I’m willing to share. It helps keep my attitude good in “real” life, and I don’t have to ::smack:: those who deserve it.

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Mad again, hence the post.

It's been over a year since I've written in this blog.  Apparently, the last time I wrote here, I was mad.   Guess what?   Yep, I'm mad.  

I am now at the library.  It stays open until 1 a.m.   I may or may not be here, it just depends on how much I calm down.   OK, I suppose every one knows I won't be here at 1 a.m., and since I don't even have as much as a toothbrush with me, I suppose I'll go home.   Eventually. 

I type about 100 words a minute.   Gusts up to that, anyway.  I am the only one here...among many students...who's typing like a bat out of...bats don't type.   I could have used a bat ealier.   I could have smacked a few people with it.    I get gleeful just thinking about it.

Both my sisters left town.   They live an hour away from me now...I'm suddenly very lonely for my sisters.

What am I mad about this time, you ask?   Glad you asked.  I got mad at the BIL for failing to do what he offered to do, disappointing someone important to me.  Then, his brother, the one I married, took his side in it.   Let's just say things got ugly.   Now, I'm stting at the library typing on a germy computer, and he's home in front of the TV, feet propped up, food to eat (I didn't even eat I was so mad.   He just wouldn't shut up!   I kept saying are you finished yet?  He would say "Yes," then keep on.   Finally, when I said, "are you finished yet?"  He said, "I'll let you know when I'm finished."   So I finished for him by leaving.  However, he won and I lost because here I sit.

I called my daughter, but she had company, and I didn't want to barge in.   Besides, I wouldn't have burdened her with my anger.   She's got plenty to deal with as it is.  I'm not proofing this.   If there's mistakes, well, so be it. 

Anyway.   I said some things I shouldn't have, as well.   He just went much, much further.   The fight shouldn't have happened, because I was right and they were wrong...and because we are adults, we shouldn't have acted that way.

I'm being nicer in this blog than I really feel because I'm really mad.   I was upset with BIL to begin with, and that man I married just thinks that anything he does is fine and dandy.   I promise you, the man has done a LOT of damage to my family.  Caused untold grief.   But that's history.   Right now, I'm mad about the current disappointment that he is.  There was a time that I thought he was heaven sent to my family, but I assure you, I was wrong.

Nuff about him.

I guess that's enough here, too.   I'll go surf the net a while.

PS:  It's really hot in here.